let’s say i was trying to get over it. just pretending to try and get over it. i wasn’t even awake but there was already a hint that something would happen today. fine, i tried my best for it to be a good start. music was blasted throughout my room in the morning for good atmosphere. guess what songs were on random in my playlist: your guardian angel, everything you want & best i ever had, in that order. not really that “let’s start monday without feeling so sad” music. it’s worse.
maybe i do have stopping issues.
it came, then sunk, then came again. it’s becoming subconscious already now. i hope i don’t get used to this feeling. or maybe i should, so the pain would atleast numb.
i am so not going there.
i have no regrets of what happened in the afternoon. not one bit. it’s a really good time for letting God stop the time and throw it in rewind. i don’t care whether what day it would start again. just, stop the time. the room, the people, the tears, the love, the fear.
bakit ang laki ng implewensya mo. sobrang laki. it’s unimaginable. and heaven knows how thankful I am for that. it’s so unfortunately sad, that i never got to experience certain things, but i honestly believe it would be so much harder to let you go. ang hirap na nga, may mashihirap pa.
…i’ll be there for you through it all, even if saving you sends me to heaven.